Climax Unknown

no space to breathe, and still ironically
no eyes to envision,
the invisible realities of
your one man desultory game,
but we never stop playing.

a thousand voices,
those creaks and that noises,
of haphazardly haunting silence in your head,
and your requiem for your conscious,
but we never stop singing.

 

stuck stationary in this hastening surrounding,
feeling the wilderness of,
your sudden unwelcome but unavoidable
anachronistic bemusement,
and you tremble along the way,
but we never stop stop moving.

 

love,desire,satisfaction,power,intellect,
virtues of a man, the feeling of disassociation.
And a kid throwing pebbles,
on the dead bright face of a lake,
beautifully vacuous of everything,
nothing to gain nothing to lose,
complete in himself,
unlike you or this work.

 

Poem Source : Unknown

Picture Source : PostSecret

 

r.A.n.D.o.m.N.e.S.S

Naresh believes I am random. Affirmation! And thus he wants me to pen down 8 random things about me. I am just feeling Okay right now, not in one of my ecstatic, top of the world moods. So I believe it’s just the right time for me to write a post like this. Hence, here I state eight random things about me:

 

1. My state of mind is so unclear that it amuses me that how am I still surviving in this sane society, even now. Earlier I used to find this a distinctive feature until I realized that this is nothing but one of the mob quality. It somehow makes me feel better, as I feel that I am not actually ‘mentally sick’.

2. I have this tendency to become suddenly so depressed and ‘over-self-criticizing’ and ‘mean-to-myself’ and ‘lets-be-a-real-life-A k hangal’, and I believe it happens for no reasons at all. But surely, that happens because of some idiotic emotional turbulence in my subconscious, perhaps though!

3. My sleeping habits are getting worse, I feel like crashing at eleven, its so early that it scares me!

4. I have never been so undecided about what to do with my life as much as I am right now. This statement remains true on every next date on the face of calendar because as long as I live, the confusion deepens and worsens.

5. I don’t want to get married, ever! And I pray that I may remain firm on at least one of the things I say I seriously believe in. On the contrary, my mind refreshes its total philosophy every three years. This scares me as well!

6. More than anything else in my life, I want to adopt a girl child. That’s my only desire today! Amen!

7. I feel like killing myself when I think about the ‘What if’ chain. It seriously takes me to nowhere and makes me feel that no use living. Thank god, it’s generally a short term spike.

8. I jump from one boat to another thinking I will row this one harder, but I never do. I have realized that I am too lazy to do anything. I think I will just be able to survive, and now I have started believing that I am far too over-rated in all the places I get appraised, paid, represented and distinguished. I am beginning to find life tough and this losing interest in life, ahh, could be dangerous. Let’s see!

Tagging:- Smriti, Biraja, Vaani, Luthra, Abhishek Harish, Eesha, Abhishek Khurana, Pooja, Sonja, Divya (This is also a platform for all those with are yet to start one, All the best!!!!)

The Gods of an atheist - Indian Ocean

It’s been a long time it seems and I would keep my promise of writing a post on my favorite Indian music band, the Indian Ocean.

I remember the first time when Chetan gave me the jhini cassette, I skeptically took it and kept it in my drawer for a good long week before deciding to remove the dust and give the band a try. It must have been 4 years now, and since then nothing, being it music or movies or food or etc etc etc has come close to the amount of sensation that music has provided me time and time again. I found as many Indian songs I could and started gulping them one by one. I remember kandisa was in my play list for a record 12 days and then I realized that there are more songs left on the planet.

Of there five albums so far, which are Indian ocean(1992), desert rain(1997), kandisa(1998), jhini(2003) and lately, black friday, I am personally a big fan of the following songs and I seriously recommend all those people who love to explore music to listen to them once, you will get addicted that’s for sure irrespective of how strongly you can resist your temptations. I personally resist a lot of temptations, but to resist this one, a person needs heavenly strength. This is my must listen list:-

Kandisa, Khajuraho, Jhini, Hile le, Ma Rewa(Favorite song of my college love Lucy!!!), Torrent, Nam myo ho(If you find better non-lyrical music, kindly take the pain of letting me know), Bharam Bhaap ke and many more.

I find myself very lucky to watch them perform live on two occasions. Coincidentally at the IIMs both the times, Ahmedabad and Bangalore. And those two evenings are surely listed as one of the most electrifying experiences of my otherwise a very boring laid back life. They have their own niche in the contemporary Indian music and I believe that even when they are not so popular on the commercial front and still a big music listening population is unaware of their presence, they must be proud of the kind of audience they attract (and mesmerize and hypnotize) and even more proud for the kind of work they have been doing for years.

On this blog, I generally mention my existential confusion and the over all meaning of life and blah blah. I am always confused about the overall ‘why’ of life, but at times when I just sit back and listen to Indian Ocean; I find a lot of answers. They are perfectionists, and at the same time, the work that they are doing and the kind of music they produce makes mere and unimportant souls like me feel really feasting on at least one of senses, which is so difficult at most of the times. And at the same time, it makes me feel that may be this is the kind of life I may like to live one day.

Read a lot more about them on their official site and on wikipedia.Indian Ocean

Thank you so very much Indian Ocean.